Figuring out life

1st week of November

Started moving about a bit more this week.

Even though it is still painful to move about a bit I have started to sit downstairs for a hour or so just to build my body back up from been in bed for the last 3 weeks. The pain I am getting is like as if I have constant stitch in my right side and it is where my old key hole surgery wound is so not sure if it related.

I have been reading a little more also and found an old word-search puzzle and have been doing that. I have also started watching the marvel phases from the beginning which has been good. Forgot how good they are. I have also been reading some of Carl Rogers books, but have been to out of it to really understand what he has been saying. So I will need to re-read what I have read because it has not sunk in (doing a eye roll as I doing typing this).

My head does not seem to be in a good place at the minute but I think that is because I am not able to get out and about at the minute and my body restricting me with having an operation. I miss going out for short walks with my furbaby either to the woods or to the beach or anywhere that I can just walk.

I have even tried to meditate but I can not focus everything just seems to much staying in these four walls and not been able to see the outside except from my window and even that does not show much. I am also finding it hard to keep focused on simple things, I want to do everything and anything all at once. It is like my brain is not working as it should and it has become sluggish.

Even writing my blogs feel like there is no purpose or meaning to them, that there is no real connection. I have been doing my blog for just over a year and looking back at everything I have come a long way from how I was but I feel I need to be more consistent with my content and bot all over the place but need to find what that is. I think I am using this more as a diary rather than something to talk about with others, to interact with others.

Now I do not know if this is because of me and not using this platform properly or what but if anyone who reads this help it would be much appreciated I have gone through the wordpress settings and information part but I think I might to need to look at it again as I only glanced over it.

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