This year for most people has been a tough year, for businesses, people, the world.
As we approach Christmas, everyone should be getting stressed over making sure they have everything they need for the Christmas dinner and getting the last bits and pieces, making sure that they have bought presents for who they need to.
But, instead we are stressing on whether we will get to see our family and friends, whether we will get to pull that cracker with someone who means everything to us, family.
As I lay here in bed thinking about christmas, I just do not know if I can be bothered with it this year, I can not spend it with family I can not go see because of this tier thing, and only allowing to see family throughout 5 days is not long enough for some.
I lay here and think how I would start doing my christmas shopping, getting presents for everyone I love, and getting a few extra decorations to put up in my house, putting on christmas tunes while wrapping presents with eggnog, then cuddling up in the evening watching Christmas movies and junk food.
I lay here and I have not bought one present, or even thought about going out and getting them, I do not even want to order on line, as to me it makes the present impersonal, yes you can look at wide range of things, but to actually look and feel that present you do not know whether it is going to be suitable for that person.
This year has to of been the most challenging year not just for me but for most of you too. Is this what Chritmas is going to be like from now on?
Most of our posts now are about keeping safe, wearing masks, wash your hands, adverts on the TV are mostly about keeping your distance and keeping other safe. Children who should be saying Mum, Dad I want that for Christmas, annoy their parents on how many sleeps to go.
As CHristmas gets closer the kids playing up at bed time because they are getting excited about what presents they are going to get from santa. I have shut myself off from the world the past weekish and my decorations are still under the stairs, and no presents are coming to my door, and my kids are now think they are to old to sit with me and watch christmas movies, or sing out christmas tunes dancing in the living room while decorating.
This year I have lost so much of myself, because I have not been able to the things I love the most, I have had to stay at home or go to work, and now I am stuck in that rut, if I have no hope for the future, then what have I got to hope for?